Sunday, November 4, 2007

The night time is the right time

I am a gigantic dork.

I'm not going to pretend to be super hip, or cool, or really ahead of my time. I'm just a big geek who spent an entire eight hours yesterday without her child but with her mother, in Amish Country, on a mission to go to a fabric store run by people who speak Pennsylvania Dutch and don't wear buttons. We had a fucking FANTASTIC time, too. We visited a cheese factory where you could see the cows wandering about outside in a field, cows that were free to eat grass and lay under trees and shit in their choice of locations. It was crowded in the shop; there were at least 60 people lined up to walk slowly around the refrigerated bins and use a toothpick to sample tiny squares of cheese. There was an obviously non-Amish lady (unless there's a "You can wear tight black jeans and too much lipstick but only if you're the announcer on Saturday" rule I'm not aware of) with a pop-star type head set on who would herd you through the door.
"Shopping? To the right. Tasting? Back of the line please. Shopping only? To the right." Repeat! Again! She also had to drone on endlessly about how you "DO NOT PLACE THE TOOTHPICK IN YOUR MOUTH! USE YOUR HANDS TO REMOVE THE CHEESE FROM THE TOOTHPICK! IF YOU PUT YOUR TOOTHPICK IN YOUR MOUTH, THROW IT AWAY AND GET A NEW TOOTHPICK!" There were also signs to that effect every 3 feet. We had to shop around the slow moving, cheese-tasting herd of people. And I shit you not, there was peanut butter cheese. Who the hell thought that would be a good idea? I have a feeling it was along the lines of "How stupid to I think the English (Amish term for us worldly folks) are? I think they are so stupid they will even eat cheese mixed with peanut butter." And we do. It tastes like peanut butter fudge, but it still weirds me out. Unnatural cheese.

One of the reasons J and I became Vegan was factory farming, and the horrible way animals are treated in the industrial food producing system. Without getting preachy, we believe that all life has worth, and regardless our your carnivore/herbivore status, you should not be unnecessarily cruel to other living things. It's especially heinous if you are doing these things solely for a profit. That being said, I MISS CHEESE! It was the hardest thing for me to change about my eating habits, this cheese love o' mine. So the Amish cheese place? Heaven. The animals were treated well, no funky shit was added to them or their milk, and I get to eat the tasty, tasty results. Mmmmm...

So back to the fabric. It's awesome. My favorite fabric I found was the last yard and a half of what appears to be something like seed packet covers of flowers with 1920/1930's style illustrations of children on them. This description does the fabric no justice. Now I really need to get my ass in gear with the pictures. But there was a ton of beautiful stuff, and even though it wasn't handmade Amish fabric (as I had been lead to believe) it was still well worth the trip. Plus, I got to hang out with my mom. I would have gone just for that. See? Geek.

When we got home I finished a skirt before we ran out to meet my family for dinner. My sister is in town with her boyfriend for the weekend, and she and my parents agreed to take the child for the night so J and I could go to a Halloween party. Where everyone had to dress as their favorite video game character. (The GEEKY! The horror!) In my defense, I never really played video games. I preferred to read if I had free time. So I was the person every costume (except Tetris. I didn't live in a hole, just on a farm) had to be explained to. Our friends are nerds, too, and they went for some obscure stuff. Or maybe not, I have no idea. But Mario and Luigi weren't there, so by normal standards these characters may have been obscure. Again, I had no idea who the hell anyone else was supposed to be.

We've finally known our friends long enough that they've all become comfortable. Spending an evening with these people has become the social equivalent of putting on my favorite sweatshirt, and we had a really nice time. We stayed out until after 1 am, and I honestly don't remember the last time we were able to do that. This sleeping thing? It rocks. So does having an awesome, dork activity filled day. Now I'm going to get ready to give the service at our Unitarian Universalist Lay-led Fellowship. It's on chaos, and features "The Second Coming" by W.B. Yeats. There's no hope for me, I know. Please, if you have read all this, go do something cool. Save yourself! Or you, too, will end up discussing the various advantages of a self-threading machine vs. an old reliable one; lots of fancy stitches vs. button-holer. Run away!!

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