Monday, February 25, 2008

Surrender, Surrender! Just don't give yourself awaaaaaay...

I give. Today has been so craptacular that by nap today I was sitting in the living room with the vacuum on bawling into my skirt. One of the infants is going through the "screaming every time he gets drowsy" phase. All kids have it-a phase where they scream like they are being boiled alive whenever they start to drift off. I AM BOILING NO ONE! So shut your scream-hole, OK kid? With one kid this stage is trying. I have all six kids here today and I am seriously questioning my vocation right now.

I give (part 2). I had a great time with my friend this weekend. It was wonderful to pick back up almost like we were still in college. Except she doesn't drink like she used to, and is much happier. Oh, and I'm married with a kid. But close! We had wonderful talks, laughed a lot, and I took our picture in a mall bathroom. I'll post that one later.

The one thing we didn't get to do together was make stuff. Time goes so fast when you're having a good time, and she was leaving before I was ready to let her go. Sunday afternoon J had people over for game, and I wanted to have a girl's craft time. Instead I worked on baby shower invites. They needed done, but I was so disappointed I didn't get to do any of the sewing I'd been hoping for. Beck (college friend) and I did make it to the fabric store, so I have more awesome fabric to sew. And tonight J is taking our little one to the library for story time, so I'm going to get some time to myself. Finally.

Balancing the work/home life thing with the daycare is very difficult. I leave the house once or twice a week, usually with E in tow. I get very little time alone, and since I grew up spending most of my time alone, this is hard for me. I adore my husband and daughter, but I've reached the point that either I take time to myself or I go batshit. Since my Waldorf class is on a Tuesday, I may take Tuesdays as the night for me. I asked J to pick a night as well so he gets the same luxury. As much as I love being a mother, it is not all I am. I need to reclaim a little of that other person before she's lost.

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