Saturday, October 18, 2008

In which the author tries to remove her own dermis

Hallo Constant Reader!

Sorry it's been so long since my last post. I was thwarted Wednesday by two children who had just recovered from food poisoning, the younger of which started barfing early and often. Thursday was busy, but I don't remember why. I had intended to write about the debate, but that obviously didn't happen. Thursday night at 10 PM E let us know her tummy hurt. By 11 she was horking full blast.

Guess what? It wasn't food poisoning. Those kids had the plague.

E stopped with the barf around 4 am, at which time I began. Let's just say Friday was a long day.

A long day that culminated in me getting hives from head to toe.

I went to the doc this morning, and was given steriods! Which, to present, seem to have done exactly shit. It turns out whatever made me so sick I am also allergic to. There may be justice in this world, and if this is payback, I'M SORRY! JUST TELL ME WHAT I DID~I'LL MAKE IT BETTER! I'm supposed to call on Monday if I'm not better. In the meanwhile I'm fantasizing about scooting my entire body across the carpet for one good scratch.

On the way home this morning John kept telling me "Not to itch" which means don't scratch in midwestern-ease, and I kept thinking of creative ways for him to die. I look like a mad scientist's experiment gone wrong, I feel like scratching my own skin off, and I'm not supposed to itch? DIE DIE DIE!!!!!!

At least the benadryl has been keeping me safely asleep so that I can do no harm to either of us. E barfed again after dinner, but I think that was a case of too much food too soon. On the up side, she barfed on John. We have a good relationship, my husband and I. John took it in stride, adn after a shower got our little one her bath and into bed. I took an oatmeal bath with two packets of oatmeal stuff, and am now contemplating a glass of wine to knock my ass out again.

Now, I know I've made the whole hives thing sound alluring, but please, do not go out and get hives. That would be a Bad Choice. Instead, get drunk for me. It's a much better way to spend your time, and I'll feel better vicariously. I prefer white, sweet wine but anything but rum will do. If you drink rum I'll start horking again, I swear.

When we got home from the doctor there was a full out fight for about 25 seconds: I wanted sympathy and John wasn't doing it correctly. He's been keeping his distance in an effort to avoid the plague, and I was feeling abandoned. He couldn't even take the day off work Friday, so E went with my mom and I tried to fend for myself. In reality, all I needed was a hug, and John fixed that. He tries really hard, but he's not always the best nurse. He did find some really good veggie bullion, and has generously made me some of the blandest food known to humanity. Gotta love the man for trying.

I was supposed to go to a silver ring making class today, but decided that was madness. 3 hours of itching and telling people to get away from me, I might be sick! I hope I either get e refund or another class. I was really looking forward to that one!

I wish I had more, or something important, to say. All I've got left is that I recommend Ivarest, which really does stop itching. They don't make it in gallon jugs, though, more's the pity. Also, I hope your weekend is a hell of a lot better than mine. Tell me, what'd you do? You, yes you, the one not scooting across the carpet, full body style.

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