Thursday, October 9, 2008

Promised pictures and a thought or two

Recycled bows! My friend Karen came over last night to help me make a few of these. I made two and a half, she made at least three, one out of a picture of a plate of meat. I'll give that bow to her, Beck or my mother in law.

This is the first one I made. They're really easy, recycle, and are cheap to make. All you need:
  • brads (for paper! Not the Pitt kind. You'd never get ANYTHING made with a Pitt around, would you?)
  • old magazine
  • scissors
You cut the magazine page into long strips, then cut those in half. Then you make a little ribbon and stick the brad through. Repeat and repeat and repeat. I recommend watching a movie or being inebriated while doing this. Maybe turn it into a drinking game. It's pretty and great, but it's also boring as hell. I found having an interesting conversation going on helped, until I gave up making bows and just had the conversation.

Here's the cheat soap. It's a cucumber avocado melt n' pour soap, with cucumber melon scent, sweet almond oil and apricot seeds added. Like I said, I'm really not making soap. I'm cheating. but I can get anywhere from 10 to 13 bars of soap for a $15 dollar investment, and it's mostly handmade. I'd love to actually make soap for real, but I hesitate to deal with anything caustic while being me. I'd lose an eye for sure.

This picture is one I just had floating around my computer. It cracks me up. It should crack up my friends, too, because those are the kinds of friends I have.

I've been slowly coming to some realizations about my friends and relationships lately. I don't have a huge list of friends, and never have. What I DO have is a small list of people I would take a bullet for, and that make me laugh and feel good about myself and the world. I don't have the time or energy for people who do not do these things, therefore, I do not have the long list of friends. I'm fine with that. To be honest, I'm really happy about the kinds of friends I have. I know the old adage is "If you love something, set it free" and in most cases that's true. But when it comes to friends and possessions, I work the other way. If I don't really love you, I'm going to let you go. There are also people I love dearly that I choose not to be around, because they will not deal with their problems. We've all got 'em, but I refuse to watch someone I love hurt themselves over and over again. I don't know what they should do, but the definition of crazy is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. I try very hard not to be judgmental; to have a live and let live policy on life, the universe and everything. Sometimes I can do that, sometimes I have to walk away. I don't want you telling me what to do, so logically you don't want me telling you how to live your life, either. And I am not the best at keeping my mouth shut when it should be, in those cases I need a little distance to gain perspective to shut the hell up already.

I have lots of friends that are going through some really weird and tough stuff right now. One friend is divorcing. Another is trying to get more time and attention from the person they love. Another is engaged in a metaphorical arm wrestling match about control in the relationship. I want to be there, to be supportive for all these people. Beck has listened to me, saved my ass and helped me out a million times, but rarely asks for help. She knows I'll be there, though, and that's what important to me. That my friends know they can always call. That I'll give them my shirt if they need it. That I will love them unconditionally. We don't need to agree politically, or about most things. We agree on the Big Stuff, like love and peace and agreeing to disagree.

I'm having some trouble, though. There are a few people I know and have counted as friends for a while now, but I feel like I've been misled. People who say one thing but do another, and more than the usual amount of that. We all behave this way to a certain extent; it's a social necessity. This goes beyond the norm, though. So I'm debating: do I love them for who they really are? Because I feel like I was deceived at the outset. The person I knew and cared about was never real, as much as the person inside might have wanted to be this other. I trusted, and was betrayed and a myriad of tiny ways, until I saw clearly for the first time just how different the person was from what they had presented themselves as. I just ended with a preposition, didn't I? Ah, hell. I guess my dilemma is this: how do you know who to keep? Some of the deceptions were major enough that the people involved are already gone, but what about the other stuff? Is there an amount by which you can measure? What tips the scale from live and let live to live and let live somewhere else? I don't know, so I'm going to be like Pooh and Think for a While. And go melt some more cheater soap, mix stuff in and put it into molds.

I hope your day is simple and pleasant and fun.


Paul said...

Those bows are dope. (I can't believe I just typed that sentence, but its true!!!)

And about the friends . . . its so weird but I think we might have VERY similar situations brewing right now. I hope you get some clarity on yours soon.

HollyLynne said...


That was me. Logged in as Paul. Sorry.

Domesticrazy said...

I love it when Paul visits!

I hope you get through your situation gracefully, too. People are just insane sometimes! And thanks for the bow love, I think they look pretty good, too! Better than I expected, anyway.

Beans said...

Ok which f'd up friend am I?
Dude you get so sappy sometimes. I love it. I appreciate you more then you know I just suck at saying it. You know me and feelings are like a kitten and a blender. I cant tank you enough for being there for me when I need you too.
As far as the other thing you mentioned we can always try making soap the next time you come up. If we f up its not like we will ruin the kitchen.
The friend thing I have found that I am a minimalist in that front. You give me enough crap for 10 friends so I have my hands full with you.
Love ya :)