Thursday, November 20, 2008

hormones and observations

For the last ten minutes I've been watching Goldie the kitten play with a cooked pea. It's amazing; she's been batting a small, soft green ball around, catching it and releasing it, all without squishing it. She really is a gentle cat, even if she must prove how fierce she is to my feet each night in bed. She's not just gentle, though, she's also a veggie cat. She loves peas, carrots, cooked celery, parsnips and cabbage. She's also eaten spaghetti, but it was covered in red sauce, so I hold that the veggie reasoning stands. I knew cats were supposed to eat a herbivore diet naturally, I just never seen it in action. Oh, and my water is better than any other water in the house, of course. Which means I'm getting new water all the time. She sticks her paws in it.

If you read the deleted post, all I can say is this: there are a LOT of hormones racing around in my gassy, nauseous body right now. Every pregnant woman I've ever known, myself included, has been a little insane from time to time. One minute things are great, the next minute you're insane, fifteen minutes later you're asking everyone why they're looking at you like that. The good news is that most of this subsides sometime during the second trimester. The bad news is it gets more intense at the very end of the third right on into postpartum, which as we all know is a crap shoot. I think I'm forming a theory about life being very much a Roulette Wheel. Oh, just pretend it's clever for now. I'll come up with something better later.

My hormone state right now is hovering somewhere between tired, "leave me alone" and cuddly. I can't wait for the calm to kick in! Also, I am either starving or never want to see food again, which is a pleasant change from my pregnancy with E. I didn't eat anything substantive for weeks with her. Except cake. My cravings are very much centered right now around vegan ice cream, apples, canned peas and grilled cheese sandwiches. I have no idea how that could make any sense, but there it is. It's a fun ride folks. Keep your arms and legs in at all times.

If all goes well, I'll be tapering off my Lexapro in 5 weeks or so. First from 20 to 10, then from 10 every day to 10 every other day. Each stage will last about a week, and then I'll be on my own. I'm looking forward to that, too, because if not for how bad it got after the last miscarriage, I would have been off my meds for two months prior to trying. Dooce just announced she's preggers, too. I wonder how she handles the crazy while pregnant? I'd email, but her announcement got over 2500 responses at last glance, and I doubt she'll have the time to read my email and respond. Anyway, wish her luck, OK? She's a funny and nice lady.

And now, it's time to take a girl up for her bath, then sneak back downstairs to make my grilled cheese with tomato and lettuce. And Peanut Butter Zig Zag vegan ice cream. And maybe some Kalamata Olives. Wow. I think I just made myself hungry and grossed myself out at the same time.

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