Monday, April 6, 2009

Busy, busy

First: insanity update. It's going better. It's honest-to-god, not even pretending to seem chipper here, going better. I don't know if it is the book the BT gave me on anxiety, more or different hormones, getting taxes nearly done except figuring out our home owner's insurance and my receipts, or what, but I feel like my feet are back under me. This is a relatively new feeling, just the last day or so, therefore I'm waiting to see if it stays and still going to talk to the docs. But MAN does it feel good not to feel like I'm about to lose my shit at any given minute!

I've come to some theories regarding this last episode of crazy. Here they are:
  1. John's car troubles might have stressed me out more than I realized.
  2. Taxes: In order to do my self employed taxes I have to go through literally every day of the past year to determine when each child arrived, who was here, when they ate, etc. Which means I went back through one of the worst years of my life day by day. I think that may have had a little to do with the panic attacks coming back. Maybe.
  3. Hormones: I have just shifted into third trimester. Just a theory...
  4. According to the Therapist's manual the therapist gave me, I am right in the window of relapse for people with anxiety attacks who treated their condition primarily with drugs and then stopped using those drugs. Add all these factors together, and Viola! I'm nuts.
The behaviorist for the kids/day care situation comes tonight. It is so completely worth losing my free evening to get some shit sorted out! I hope he is as wonderful as I remember him being when he taught us to get our little E to sleep at night. Tomorrow night we're celebrating my Grandmother's 80 somethingth birthday, and Wednesday it's my BT night. After that, Thursday is free, Friday is free? and this weekend we're back to PA for Easter with John's parents. Then we all colapse and sleep for as long as we can and start this shit all over again.

Two things! Thing one: Momversations. John heard one I was listening to on Dooce and told me his head almost fell off from how insipid it was. I find them mostly interesting, which leads me to believe that is you haven't gestated and squeezed a living being out of your vagina that you won't like these. If you go to Dooce, click the link on the right, listen in and let me know what you think.

Thing two: Man, this is sad. I forget thing two. How about, it's snowing here! Stupid snow. Or, um, I have lots of sewing I want to do, but need to finish a ton of crap first! Or, my sister's wedding invitations are not started! There's also: I need to buy maternity underwear, because it seems that I threw it all away last time! Why would I do that?! And lastly: I'm going to go get the mail! And look for receipts! I WANT MY TAXES FINISHED! To hell with 2008, you are over! BE GONE WITH YA! I just ate a big peice of chocolate bunny. Sugar!

1 comment:

HollyLynne said...

The taxes can be a huge weight on your shoulders, I can totally see how that would be stressing you out. Congrats on getting them almost done! Haven't watched Momversations because I hate internet video (I'm here to READ THINGS, if I wanted to WATCH THINGS thats what TV is for!), but ok ok, on your reccomendation I will!